assiest: 2 life vests left on the titanic this one’s for me.. this one’s for my homies who died tonight *tosses into ocean*
filharmagic: an anime where everyone in a high school are pastel-haired tropes, involved in crazy, often unrelated circumstances (one group of friends hunts ghosts, there’s a group of magical girls, a bunch of love triangles, etc) but the main characters of the show are brunette kids who are really confused all the time
tourist: could you give us directions to Olive Garden?
new yorker: no, but i could give you directions to an actual Italian restaurant lol
tourist: oh you think you're clever???
new yorker: what
tourist: i'm going to meet my dying neice and she happens to love olive garden so her whole family is going to eat with her so she'll have a few moments of happiness
new yorker: oh... oh i'm so sor
tourist: no shut the fuck up you piece of shit. i'll find it myself
the tourist drives off and the new yorker is left to think about his life choices and his decision to be a giant condescending asshole
jadeita: so yeah i was messing about on the pokemon fusion when holy shit what the hell is that RUN FOR YOUR LIVES IT’S THE APPETIZER!!!
kirbyrightbackatya: do you ever see someone with the same name as you and your immediate reaction is just
illkim: *throws $20 bill at stripper* hey can I have the change
msjewbooty: yea man I got us hooked up FOR LIFE…. u should see the amount of lip balms I bought…………. like 2,000,000 of them……. tonight we feast like kings…..
copythatbabycakes: That girl you just called impatient? Shes been waiting for Animal Crossing: New Leaf since 2010.